Call me stubborn, but I refuse to quit! T.R.U.E. G.R.I.T. is the foundation to success in learning and life! Exploring the dynamics of a successful classroom and how grit is a vital characteristic for student achievement
I was walking past a storefront the other day when I saw a sign that read, “The Sun is Shining Just For You!” I felt a smile stretch across my face. For one second, I thought to myself how amazing is that… just for me!
As I continued on, I felt myself a little lighter on my feet and truth be told, in my heart. I went from looking around to looking straight forward and into the eyes of others, just trying to capture what was around me. With each shop, I started noticing the lighter moments. The small talk. The giggles. The laughter. It was like the sun was truly shining everywhere!
people helping others
doors being held
pleases being said
And thank yous being offered in return.
kindness in voices
care in words be spoken
love being shared.
where had I been
what else had I been missing, when I wasn’t looking forward.
That quote had shifted my mindset in one small moment. I had been filling my head with so much noise… like a storm that keeps you up at night, I had forgotten about the sun and how it does shine! I decided that I was going to head back and buy that quote. I planned to set in a place so that I would have to pass and read each day. When I entered the store, I looked everywhere. I asked a young lady working if there were any more copies of the quote in the window. As luck would have it, that was the last one and it was not for sale. With one last glance, I looked back to grab another glimpse as I left the store. It was then that I realized there was more. I had missed the bottom half, tucked behind a figurine. It read,
“what will you do with it?”
Oh, Wow! What would I do with it? I was convinced that it wasn’t for sale for a reason. It wasn’t mine to buy and keep for myself, it was meant to be given away. As I walked away, I knew that was there for me to read that day. So I leave you with this,
The Sun is Shining Just For You! What will you do with it?
My eyes have seen so much in my lifetime and my heart has felt each and every single moment. This is my story, one of circumstances, courage, love, and faith. I have seen the purest of love, felt laughter that has come from my toes, and have also had to refocus my faith at times when life didn’t feel as easy as I had hoped. My start in this world has always guided my journey… It has been my foundation, my compass, and my saving grace. I must never forget where I came from as it was there that my faith saved my soul.
To have complete trust
have full confidence
commit without reservation
My faith didn’t start as other Christians may share. For me, my journey in my faith was an escape from my own reality, one that fear dominated all of my senses. With fear, came a smaller world to live in and that was not what my heart was looking for… but someone once told me that fear and faith cannot live in the same home and it was from that point that trust had to be built for the grand living I had planned in my head!
I was committed to finding a better me.
The day came… I was but a child, and my neighbors offered to pick me up each Sunday and take me to church. They had noticed my family had gone on occasion to another local church, but not consistently and they wanted to offer this opportunity to me. All I had to do was be ready and waiting at the bottom of the driveway each Sunday. All I could think of was if they see potential in me, I need to open my eyes and see it too! I built up the courage and jumped on the chance. I made sure I was ready and waiting. Not because I was a good Christian girl, but because it gave me an opportunity to see beyond myself… to be around a place of calm when most often my own life was feeling nothing short of chaos. This experience was leading to a better me and I could feel it inside, filling me up. I would sit down in the pew and soak in every word being said. I would open up the hymnal and sing every song as if my heart had written each one. I believed if I looked for better in the world, I would see it. I didn’t know what shape it took or if I would know when it was right in front of me, but what I did learn quickly was how it made me feel and that was something I always recognized… it was a sense of trust, belief, confidence, and commitment. My FAITH was starting to grow inside me and I was no longer seeing the world through a lens of fear. I was but a child, age 7-8 , and I was certain that I wanted to be a part of something so much bigger than me.
Love steers so much of what I do. As the years have passed, my faith has been lifted, beautified, rattled, and at times felt like it had been crushed. I am most certain the biggest reason my faith has waivered has been because of how deeply I love. From the chaotic world we live in to the loss of dear loved ones, not to mention the ups and downs of raising children (which in itself is the scariest experience ever as we try to be the best parents possible to each of them individually), all while trying our best to live a life of goodness, balance, one of faith… one that serves.
As I age, I can now see that it is not a dark cloud that life hangs over me at times or that I was dealt a hand worse off than another… this. is. life. It is my life and in order to see the good around me, I must be the good around me. I must look for it, create it, and hold on to my faith to strengthen it.
This is my path. This is my journey. This is my heart. This is my faith.
“If I took my connectivity out of the equation of who I am, I would probably understand how much more I really can do as a human and be what I need to be for people in my life. I feel that I have been so incredibly blessed to be a connected educator and appreciate how it has helped me both professionally and personally with the friendships that I have acquired. In turn, I now know that other parts of my life have taken a hit because of it.”
This was something that I shared with my friend, Rachelle Dean-Poth, as we voxed back and forth one-day last week. I was flying solo on my 3rd walk of the day while camping. Rachelle and I weren’t engrossed in a conversation of learning, this was simply a moment of missing a friend. One that I have been blessed to have in my world for the past several years. We were talking about all that we love about everything we do. We spoke about how we miss many conversations that we used to find ourselves in on a daily basis, but that the reality is that there simply are not enough hours in a day. It came down to one point… if we use too many of our hours being connected we will miss out on what is right in front of us. In the midst of our conversation, I literally stopped and said, “You know, I should blog about this!” Ha! Well, here I am!
REVISIT and REFLECT
As I continue to revisit and reflect on bets (chapters) that Jacie and I wrote in our book, “All In: Taking a Gamble in Education,” I turn my attention to Bet 20: “Double Down on Your PLN.” In this bet, we reminded our readers how social media can transform relationships and connect you with a network of educators to provide support and inspiration. We asked our readers to share what inspiration they found outside of their personal school district that has helped them to move forward. Our Double Down at the end of the bet prompted each reader to ask themselves… what is one way you can contribute, in place of consuming? It is my time to revisit, reflect, and re-frame this Bet, and I challenge each of you to do the same.
CALL TO ACTION: As a connected educator, OWN your part as a leader for every child and contribute what you have learned through your PLN without giving up your own identity and balanced existence
One of the biggest gifts I have been given is my incredible PLN. No buts about it. The one thing that I have learned is that by surrounding myself with those that are incredibly passionate about the same things in life as myself, I have grown beyond anything I have ever imagined! With that has come something else that I have learned… when I am contributing all that I have gained, at times I knock myself off balance from the world that I share with my family. This is where I re-framemy accountability in how and when I use my social media, not to mention how and when I connect with the most incredible friends and passionate educators that have truly blessed my world. I don’t believe there is a one size fits all approach, but for me, I have learned to navigate this in a different way over time.
Did you ever have someone say they love how your friendship can pick up where you left off? Whether it is a week or even a month, we don’t look back thinking of “what we missed”, but in turn, we live in the moment and look forward to “what can be!” No apologies, just welcoming arms. These are the people within my PLN/PLF that I find to get the most out of what I can humanly offer. We learn great amounts from one another. We take that information to create a better tomorrow for every child, but we do not hold the other to an obligation of connecting continuously. Let’s face it, now that we are truly connected educators we have blended “colleague status”/acquaintances with friendships that we are wired to give more attention to… so where do we go from here? Let’s get back to the roots of why being a connected educator is so important to you, your students, colleagues, and community.
For me, a connected educator means (not in order of importance, simply a list of impact):
-A constant support system (that is a give and take)
-Embraced risk-taking and disruption
-The constructive push-back that propels me forward
-Learning with a diverse PLN (Professional Learning Network)
-Leading beyond the four walls of my own existence
-Kindness connections that nurture my soul
-Joyful Leaders that remind me that my heart can impact the same as my brain
-The laughter that comes with endless conversations
To Be Better Than My Yesterday!
(graphic created and posted in 2018)
Being better than my yesterday has been my mantra since I was a child. Keeping my focus on a “me vs me” mentality and limiting my comparison to others has helped me to grow. What I am humanly capable of looks different from week to week, but for me, I must prioritize and keep focus… I challenge you to do the same!
Family First Always
Self Care/Well-Being (#1-2 are the same level of importance… the analogy of putting your mask on before trying to save others always stops me in my tracks)
Learning and Growing/Social Media
Contributing in all ways possible!/Social Media
If I truly want to Re-frame this Bet and take this CALL TO ACTION and live it, I must first keep numbers one and two on my list in balance. From there, anything is possible!
As I close up my remote learning experience and turn my sights towards the fall, I am reminded of an important bet that Jacie and I wrote in our book, “All In: Taking a Gamble in Education.” In Bet 11, “It’s All About the View”, we pushed our readers to reflect on their school culture. We questioned whether districts were fostering a culture of yes or no. Our Double Down at the end of the bet prompted each reader to ask themselves… Is there something that you can remove to make room for betterment? It is my time to revisit, reflect, and re-frame this Bet, and I challenge each of you to do the same.
CALL TO ACTION: OWN your part as a leader for every child and create new opportunities for betterment
REVISIT and REFLECT
The million-dollar question being asked right now is, “What will learning look like in the fall?” There is no doubt in my mind that I will not agree, nor will I want to teach and learn within all of the constraints and restraints that will be what I call side-effects of #COVID19. That leaves me with more out of my control than within… if that is my view.
I could spend my summer planning what I hope to be. But I won’t.
I could reface the curriculum based on remote learning. But I won’t.
I could fill up with resentment that flexible seating has been removed from my students’ learning space. But I won’t.
I could have negative conversations about the “What ifs” that surround the unknown. But I won’t.
I could fill my community up with my disappointment on how my philosophy for learning and teaching may no longer mirror the execution of what needs to be or will come. But I won’t.
I could keep revisiting what once was and reflect on what I once did. But I won’t. It is now time for me to re-frame my thinking.
In place of that, I will make room for betterment. I will look towards the fall with hope. I will move beyond a dream and plan for what I can do to make a difference in the lives that I am blessed to impact. Let’s not forget, THEY ARE WATCHING… what view are we creating for them?! Our children are relying on us to lead them through this time. We don’t get to step down from that leadership role as adults, especially now. This is not about school boards, administration, and teachers in isolation as educators, this is about our community as role models. WE, as adults, are leaders with our actions and words, so I ask you… how will you lead? How will you open up opportunity for betterment? They are watching.
I will give my children (both biological and community-blessed) the summer to be the resilient humans that they are in order to replenish and recharge themselves (never underestimate the resilience in a child).
I will remind them that their mindset is a powerful investment and they themselves must give, in order to gain a return.
I will embrace moments to fill others up and remind them that education is a privilege that each of us is blessed and responsible in supporting.
I will take hold of the unknown and settle my fears by staying focused on the known fact that one way or another I will be able to help children learn, grow, and find purpose in their efforts.
I will refocus, rephrase, and redirect conversations within the community to re-frame our efforts on positivity for our children. WE OWE THIS TO THEM!
I will nurture my own self-care and refrain from apology when I am in need of disconnecting. This cannot be just when I am burnout on life, this must be a way of life!
Increase time with those that care about me
Make time to play
Rebuild problem-solving skills
I will own my part in my role as a member of this community. I will own my views and the impact of them on others. I will own my role as a leader to which goodness, faith, hope, and love are being sought by the children who have just lived through something that no adult can possibly ever understand. I owe this to them.
Children are truly amazing! It is said that when children are resilient, they are more curious, braver, more courageous, more adaptable, and more able to extend their role into the world. The one thing that a child needs in order to regain and build resiliency is a strong relationship with a loving and caring adult. Stop and ask yourself, “What am I projecting?” What legacy am I leaving for our children? How am I owning my part in raising our future leaders? Are you owning your part? Will you be the loving and caring adult building a strong and positive relationship for a child? Let’s remember,
During this historic time, each of us have been tested. We have been pushed, pulled, poked, and prodded in ways that I do not think any of us could have ever imagined. Those who know me, know that I truly believe that everything happens for a reason. As I referenced in a recent post, there are always good things that come out of hard times. For me, this has been a time of tremendous reflection, questioning, and pursuit of deeper understanding. I am grateful for my #PLN and especially #BlogginThruIt. They have given me the space to express my thoughts, analyze my thinking, and dig deep.
As I navigate through this time, I have been grappling with my role as a leader and what relationships should and could look like. Vulnerability requires trust. Trust requires vulnerability. Healthy relationships require trust AND vulnerability! -Sari
As soon as I heard Sari say she was “grappling with her role as a leader,” I knew our friendship would be lifelong. It is the grapple that we feel inside that leads us to a better way. Through self-reflection we question and when we question we face honest answers that may be tough to hear at times. It is the grapple that makes me thrive, not only within, but with others! -Kristen
The Beginning of a Powerful and Healthy Relationship
Kristen and I connected through Twitter over a few tweets about George Couros’ inspiring book Innovate Inside the Box. Little did I know that when we connected, Kristen was wrapping up her own powerful book with Jacie Maslyk, All In: Taking a Gamble in Education A few short months later I was honored to join the first #AllInEDU book study, facilitated by #2MenAndABook. Chapter 2 of All In, or as Kristen and Jacie call it, Bet 2, is titled Poker Face. This chapter dives into the misguided belief that many of us have heard over the years: Don’t smile until Christmas; don’t let your guard down or you will lose control. As I started this chapter, I thought, I don’t have a poker face! I am open and transparent. I pride myself on the value of relationships. I continued to read in agreement. This is not a time to put up walls and create barriers; it’s time to break them down and make connections. Exactly.
Jacie and Kristen’s words spoke to me in a very dynamic, meaningful way. Integrating both perspectives, teacher and administer, resonated with me on so many levels. Understanding perspectives is key to developing empathy. As I reflect on who I am as a leader and consider the type of leader I strive to be, Kristen shared a courageous statement that profoundly impacted her district, and now me. -Sari
Through Sari’s reflection, I just felt this in my core all over again… this was such a bold and vulnerable statement I made that turned my entire life upside down in the blink of an eye! To know it resonated with Sari, and brought us to this blog together, speaks to me in the most profound way possible! -Kristen
Simultaneously, at work, we were having some very serious conversations that I needed to process. The discussions were truly weighing on me. I bottled up my emotions on the inside, placed a smile on the outside, and considered what I was feeling. Then it hit me…I was NOT being open. I was NOT being transparent. I was NOT being vulnerable. I was wearing a poker face. -Sari
This right here is such an awesome moment! This new perspective on something that I wrote with such conviction resonates with me. The idea that something could be perceived so differently. It is “push back” or questioning that gains perspective, and it is that space of vulnerability that affords for this to happen! Although my questioning has been viewed differently by others throughout my career, I believe that push back to one’s view should never equate disrespect (and that is how the admin felt that day with my bold statement). There are times that I feel when someone is invested in their own perspective they cannot stop and feel, or see someone else’s view. What then? How do we possibly serve and move forward if we cannot see what is right in front of us? -Kristen
Was I pushing back? Do I have walls? And even worse, do I have walls that I don’t see? Am I living a belief that mirrors “not smiling until Christmas?” Am I missing what is right in front of me? I struggled with this…I began to consider that perhaps I don’t lead by example. I felt a flash of discomfort.
I pushed my thoughts and questions into our Voxer book study and an incredible discussion ensued. Is it ever okay to have a poker face? Can a poker face protect others? Be vulnerable, but be strong….what does that really look like? Does a poker face mean dishonesty? How do you support others when you are still struggling yourself?
For our students, it is important that they receive information in a developmentally appropriate way. Or perhaps there is information that our little people should not hear at all. Does that mean that I am lying by omission?
“You don’t seem concerned, so I’m not concerned.” That phrase was said to me just last year by a staff member. It served as a reminder that our emotions can be contagious, both positive and negative emotions. If I choose to process my emotions before sharing with my staff is that dishonesty? -Sari
OM to the G! This right here is full gains! Another perspective… Maybe this perspective states that it is beyond appropriateness for just children… is it possible that there is information that adults should not hear/share just yet or at all… it all takes on a different view when restated with different intent. -Kristen
INTENTION! When I read Kristen’s words I realized that our WHY behind the poker face is most important. It is not about power or losing control of our classroom, building, or district. It is about putting others first. As educators, we have a responsibility to ensure we discuss important topics with students in a way that is developmentally appropriate but also provides opportunities to hear all stories, practice empathy, and build understanding.
We are navigating a precarious time. There are so many unknowns. School districts are facing significant state budget cuts. School districts are making decisions that no one ever wants to have to make; their impacts will be felt far and deep. Many districts will come out of this looking very different. What is the best way to handle this? There is already so much tension in the system. -Sari
How will it look? At first glance, it may appear that it is possibly not for the better… for now! Is it possible that these moments, when we have fewer options, will help us to appreciate the ones that are given? Think about the budget cuts and the shifting in one’s practice… will we still find opportunity in this change or will we snub it because it does not mirror the vision we once had. MakerSpaces… gone, but why? Is this a blame game? Do we trust those that have these very difficult decisions to make? Options to learn a foreign language… will they exist? Will they be plentiful? What about flexible seating… something that students love and are now embracing with ownership over their choices and actions? Will it be gone? Will it come back? Will we find voice and choice in this most radical time of change OR will we do what has already been done before and REVOLT? Is it the emotional attachment to what could have been? Is it the reality that our dreams are no longer our own to shape? Is it the vulnerability that we feel to be within a space of less control? What is it that scares you the most? Is it trust? What is it about education that children fear will change? Will we ask them? And if we do, how will we receive their answers. Will we cut them off and hand them the reason or excuse? Will we steer them to be more empathetic in their response so that it hurts us a little less? Will we even ask? And what will we do? Is it possible that the solution or vision of change lies with them and not us at all? Are we willing to let children reshape what we have created for hundreds of years… all while doing it within the constraints that our reality lies in.
Reality check… can we afford it? Have we given enough voice to our students to open their eyes and minds to an opportunity that does not look like their initial vision? Do we trust? Can they innovate inside the box, as George Couros has pushed us to question and rethink our philosophy and our practice? This right here will be very telling of what was before and what will be! -Kristen
One lesson I have learned during this time is the power of “I don’t know.” Kristen poses so many thoughtful questions. My answer to some of those questions has been…”I don’t know.” As a person, let alone as a central office administrator, it goes against the fabric of my being to just hang within a space of…”I don’t know.” I am not implying that I believe that I have all of the answers. However, I know how to seek out the answers. David Weinberger said it best, “The smartest person in the room is the room.” In order to get the best answers, we have to bring all perspectives into a room and hash it out. During this historic time, even that strategy has not worked. Throughout this pandemic, we have only been able to answer questions that focused on the here and now. All along we have been missing critical data to answer questions about our future…When will schools open their doors again? What will graduation look like? What is the best way to support students when we return to brick and mortar? How do we create a warm, welcoming learning environment while following CDC guidelines? How much more funding will the state cut? Will there be another wave of the virus? If so, when?
My experiences these past few months have reinforced that responding “I don’t know” is not bad. Saying nothing at all, avoiding the conversation, wearing a poker face, or faking it, breaks down the relationships and shows a lack of respect. Being vulnerable, discussing the facts of the situation, rather than silence, avoiding the question, or guessing, has proven to be invaluable. -Sari
The one thing known right now is the unknown. I have the utmost respect for the response “I don’t know.” Would I like to have a more detailed answer… of course! But in the end, the upfront honesty is what I need the most as an educator and parent. My friend, Tara Martin, shared with me that if I don’t tell my story someone else will, and in many ways, I feel that the same idea applies to this situation as well. If I am led to believe that administration has all of the answers, but are not divulging them, I may assume that they are withholding valuable information when in all actually they simply do not know. Assumptions can lead to inaccurate thoughts and unwarranted worry. That assumption is driven by a similar fear that holds leaders of all roles back in simply answering, “I don’t know.” Assumptions can be the detriment to most everything, with one being relationships. It is our relationships that will see us through… with them, we have trust and with trust we have hope. – Kristen
Each of us has a choice. In the absence of the answers, I am present and intentional. I choose transparency. I choose vulnerability. I choose to trust. I choose relationships. I choose HOPE! What do you choose? -Sari
Sari Goldberg McKeown has served as an educator in an array of K-12 roles for over fifteen years, including classroom teacher, literacy specialist, supervisor, and coordinator. Currently, she serves as a central office administrator on Long Island, New York. Sari is a lifelong learner. She is pursuing her doctoral degree at St. John’s University and is honored to be a part of the #EdCampLI planning team. Sari believes education is about who we teach, not just about what we teach. She is passionate about culture, relationships, and learning from each other. Sari believes in the power of being a connected educator. As educators, we are all in this together!
Why did it take a virus to bring the people back together?
– Tom Foolery
This very question, asked by the boy in the video, brings upon a self-reflection, leading to a chain reaction that leaves a lasting impression. Skies were full of smog and cars zipped by, we did not give a second thought as people died. As we stayed inside and the earth began to heal, we all were brought together united as steel. – Rob
There it is…that moment when everything seems so clear. When you think the dust is settling and you are about to open your eyes to what feels like the aftermath of a terrible storm. The world suddenly stops spinning for just a moment and you begin to take another look.
It was a world of waste and wonder… of poverty and plenty. Back before we understood why hindsight’s 2020.
– Tom Foolery
The emotions overcome you and you realize that this is no longer your vision. The vision you planned, nurtured, and were about to execute… the one that your heart got swept up in. Now, your mind is exploding in a full-blown sprint, and you find yourself chasing it down hoping to catch up to what seems out of reach… the reassurance that everything will be okay. And then the moment begins to fade and a new feeling sweeps over you. After a long pause, something begins to grow within. It is like you have to pinch yourself as a reminder that you are there and that you can take control. This is a moment. The moment of realization. One that you open your eyes to when life changes overnight! -Kristen
It is staring you right in the face. A new idea or possibly a better way. Something that you never saw coming until it fell straight into your lap or better said, has you in a complete choke-hold. Yes, that is the moment. The one that tells you every bit of your being is about to change. Life as you knew it is taking on a new vision, a new version. A better version… one of yourself and how you will create an impact. This is the moment that you “dust off your instincts” and begin to live once again! -Kristen
When we found the cure and were allowed to go outside… We all preferred the world we found to the one we left behind.
– Tom Foolery
“The Great Realization” is now when the 2020 vision was all of a sudden turned upside down, people were quarantined, schools were closed, businesses slowed, and people began to connect with one another. As relationships strengthened and flourished, we took the time to take walks, breathe the fresh air, and notice that the sky was no longer filled with planes. At night, stars could be seen, animals were safer, and less cars buzzed past as we sat on our porches enjoying the quiet.
Many people approached the scenario with anxiety and apprehension, but soon an Ahh ha moment occurred as we slowed our pace to appreciate one another and our beautiful earth with all of its natural beauty. When we began to take notice, children began expressing that they missed school and their teachers. Teachers learned new technologies because they missed their students and classrooms. The need to connect became apparent, and our focus shifted to what was important… the simplicity of human connection. – Rob
There are moments when “human connection” feels out of reach as we attempt to navigate these uncharted, murky waters. A new journey with a new path, one that doesn’t have a map, let alone understanding. It is going to take a village to lift us to higher ground, Life-lines are within reach. Those lifelines come in the form of colleagues, administrators, students, parents, family, friends, and even strangers. “Needs” would override “wants” and soon relevance begins taking shape within a learning space that once had to persuade others that technology could find purpose in their learning. It is here. Relevance is speaking and with it, purpose is driving out room for doubt. In turn, interpretation and perception have moved to the forefront of communication begging empathy and understanding to take hold. How will we merge these two worlds? – Kristen
Could this result in closing the gap between “poverty and plenty” or between those youngsters who are plugged in and those who would much rather have a conversation? Perhaps, this unwanted pandemic will yield a positive change… even more connections to one another… cultivated relationships… new technologies learned… a more efficient and empathetic… perhaps a kind perspective with grit and perseverance to maintain human connection. – Rob
Rob Wottawa is currently the Director of Art, ENL, Music, and World Languages in the East Islip School District on Long Island, NY. As a leader, he works to approach all situations with a kind empathetic lens to support the grit that is needed to accomplish the goals of his teams. Since completion of his doctorate in 2015 he has presented his research in New Mexico, Salt Lake City, and Long Island on Advice to First-Year Teachers. He recently completed a study with a Math professor from Stony Brook University on Parents’ Perceptions of Math and Math Education. Personally, Rob shares his time with his wife and two girls on Long Island. Where they love to cook, bake, and read together. In his spare time he enjoys mountain biking, road biking, running, and performing on various instruments. He hopes he can make his family proud!
As I push myself to disconnect from all the things, I can’t help but reminisce back to when I would sit with my boys in their toddler years and read “Goodnight Moon” over and over and over again to the point of memorization. This is dedicated to all the parents who have walked this walk and know the great green room I’m talking about. Enjoy!
In the quiet living room
There was an Xbox
And a loud boom
And the sound of…
Friends chatting over Zoom
And there were 100 streaks that Snapchat speaks
And three little posts of Instagram boasts
And a little pack of gum
And a snack crumb
And a pencil And a pen
And a five and a ten
And a little ol’ request for V-Bucks again
Goodnight friends chatting over ZOOM
Goodnight Xbox And the loud boom
Goodnight food fests
Goodnight pack of gum
Goodnight little crumb
And goodnight to the repeated request for V-Bucks again
Goodnight Remote Learning
Goodnight to all the questions that are still burning
-A remote learning spin-off of my sons’ favorite book “Goodnight Moon.”
I have to admit that there have been moments in my career where I have felt alone. It’s not the kind of alone where you feel like you have been abandoned on a deserted island. I’ve always been fortunate to have colleagues to laugh with, talk about family, friends, and personal adventures with; it’s the kind of a feeling where you are yearning for more perspective and professional conversations that stretch far beyond your classroom, school building, and district walls. Perhaps it’s because I previously worked in another field outside of education or that I have been employed in other school districts. I have encountered different styles of leadership, various types of school cultures, student populations, and collaboration styles. I guess there is something about being in the same space that can become too routine, stagnant, and mundane (if you let it). Why was I always finding myself trying to push down the walls in order to find the disruptors of conventional teaching and learning practices? Growth is something that festers within. You can feel the ideas churning in the pit of your stomach; you can see the big picture clearly; you attempt to design roadmaps that will guide you to a continuously evolving destination. Yet, you are longing for thinking partners who have that same type of stirring feeling inside. These are the people who are insanely passionate about what they do; they dream, they wonder, they develop visions, and challenge the status quo. And, sometimes when you least expect it, they magically appear and disrupt your world. You can feel yourself gravitating toward their innate desire to experience growth with you amidst a habitual sea of tradition. -Lauren
So many of us have been there… that point where you feel like the world is going on without you or maybe you are not even aware that there is a world beyond your immediate one. We don’t always recognize it; as our connections are strong with those around us. The fact of the matter is, it isn’t them, it is us. The disruptor in us that needs to be reenergized and pushed against. The internal conflict that we thrive on turns nonexistent and in place of it is a comfort and form of consistency that equates stagnancy to us. Then it starts to happen, something gnaws at your heart and spirit… something is saying that where you are just isn’t enough. There may even be a point of resentment that you can’t identify with because it doesn’t pertain to any one person, it really is yours to claim. You feel lifeless without opportunity because somewhere along the journey you forgot that your voice not only mattered but that it is also your own responsibility to use for growth. That mundane moment may turn into unlimited time (if you let it). -Kristen
Disruption is an Open Invitation to Oneself
And then it happened…I remember learning about Twitter from a colleague. “Lauren, just check it out. Thereare SO many educators sharing ideas, and the instant access to authors and literacy leaders…AMAZING.” Full transparency, I didn’t take the Twitter plunge right away. In fact, in 2014, I reluctantly downloaded the app to my Smartphone only to discover that I had already set up an account in 2012. I noticed that the username I created wasn’t reflective of the educator in me (@Lau7210), but it commemorated my first AOL email account, “Lau” (all my close friends call me that) and my birthday (7210). I didn’t put much thought into changing my Twitter handle; instead I was more anxious to explore this digital arena of promise. At the time, I had two followers, (my sister-in-law and a random person) and had never sent out a tweet. I immediately started searching for and following literacy gurus and expert educators like Nancie Atwell, Lucy Calkins, Fountas and Pinnell, Jennifer Serravallo and Dr. Mary Howard. And oh my goodness, that feeling when another educator followed me back was so exciting! I know that sounds really nerdy and perhaps odd, but it made me happy. I became a total Twitter voyeur. It’s like I was standing at the end of the bridge admiring the intellectual wonderland that was filled with collaborative conversation, professional discourse, and fresh ideas from educators across the globe. How could I have been sheltered from this accessible learning frenzy for so long? I watched, I read, I observed, and followed various Twitter chats frequently. One Thursday night, I stumbled upon the Twitter chat, #G2Great; a chat that revolved around meaningful and relevant literacy topics. At the time, it was facilitated by Dr. Mary Howard, Jenn Hayhurst, and Amy Brennan. I don’t remember the topic of the chat, but I vividly recall the feeling of fascination as I watched tweets flood into my Twitter feed, and rush right into my heart and soul. I marveled at the educators who had the courage to “tweet away”, share their philosophical beliefs, and contribute authentic examples of how innovative ideas were put into practice in their own classrooms/school districts. I gradually began raising my foot onto the bridge instead of standing at the edge. I crafted tweets in my head, pressed the “tweet” button, typed the words, revised them to meet the Twitter character limit, to only abruptly step off the bridge. Why would experts and other lead learners want to read my thoughts and ideas about the education field? Nevertheless, just a few weeks later, and with one eye open, I leaped onto that bridge and began walking across it….and then, I tweeted! Sending that first tweet in the Twitter chat transformed the trajectory of my career. I shared my spirit, my voice, my practice. As I crossed the bridge that evening, the responses began pouring in. I was moving toward a golden pot of endless professional learning opportunities that were waiting for me on the other side. It felt as if educators I had never known before were waving me in and giving me an open invitation to their professional party. There was a seat at the table just for me, to network, to connect, to collaborate. It was then that I realized that there was a disruptor within me. -Lauren
Disrupting the status quo may never come in a pretty little invite with your name spelled boldy across the middle, but it will come in open and honest conversations with others and yourself. You will feel that sense of urgency to shake things up if you take the time to place yourself around other experiences. You may even be at a point that you feel worn down and actually consider not showing up or regretfully declining the offer, but it will weigh on you. You will find yourself questioning the what if?
What if I had said yes?
What if I had just been myself and added my thoughts to the conversation?
What if I tried that?
What if I had just become more connected?
What if I had shown up for the professional party?
Those open invites will always be there because we know that change is inevitable. We can either show up and join in, or not show up at all. The disruptor in us will not be satisfied if we don’t at least try to attend. But that will not be enough for us. The disruptor inside of us will be the one tapping to the beat of the music while sitting around the table thinking what others are not willing to entertain… Why isn’t anyone else dancing? And then it will happen, because you just won’t be able to contain yourself anymore.
Two weeks ago was just like any other ordinary week for me. My connection to the world was strong and in full force. I was looking over the color-coded excel spreadsheet my husband made that meticulously listed my children’s upcoming sports practices and game schedules. There were so many things running through my head. I sat there trying to figure out how to be in two places at once. Who would I need to connect with to make it all happen? How could my networking help balance the perpetual to-do list? I knew I needed to start by making the necessary carpool plans. Then my mind shifted to visiting my Outlook calendar to check for upcoming meetings. I was excited to squeeze in time with my team to collect more raffle donations from local businesses in preparation for EdCampLI After Dark. I thought about the hundreds of new books I had to inventory and distribute to teachers’ classrooms and the shared level libraries within the buildings I work in. I needed to make this happen so that all students could have immediate access to them. On top of all of this, I was also feeling a bit stressed, but extremely enthusiastic about gathering all of the materials and revisiting the research around the topic I was going to share and present at the Lilac/Nassau Reading Council 2020 annual conference.
While all of these responsibilities were stacked in piles in my mind, like puzzle pieces are thrown together in a box, I could visualize the big picture clearly. Each time I connected those pieces, I could feel the tension slowly release. You know the feeling you get when you put the last piece of the puzzle in the picture? You breathe that sigh of relief and feel incredibly accomplished for the hard work that was put in to commemorate that moment. I COULD make this happen and I WOULD!
At the same time, I found myself insanely dedicated to listening to the messages in the #AllinEDU Voxer Book Study (Voxer: an online walkie-talkie app) group I am currently participating in. Passionate educators from across the country are making time to share their thoughts and perspectives about the book All In: Taking a Gamble in Education by Kristen Nan and Jacie Maslyk, all while engaging in various other topics in education. It is important for me to put myself out there and continue to grow so that I can be the best I can be in my position as an Instructional Coach. A major focus of my job is to stay on top of the latest research and instructional practices, continuously build relationships, connect, network, collaborate, be reflective, stretch teachers’ thinking about the impact that they can have on the social, emotional, and academic growth of their students, not to mention inspire and motivate them to push the envelope in order to be the best versions of themselves. For me, these Voxer groups have been my way to escape to a professional playground that invites nerdy conversations, allows me to share my voice freely, and has also challenged me to think differently about the organizations we work in including our colleagues, the students, and community we serve. I actually yearn for these networks, crave these intellectual discussions, and thrive on developing relationships and expanding my PLN (professional learning network) with other passionate educators from around the country.
And then…”We interrupt this regularly scheduled program to bring you this message…”
It was Friday, March 13th, 2020, a day I will never forget. This day looked very different Monday-Thursday of that very same week. It was a day of the unknown, as new information about the COVID-19 pandemic was trickling in on a moment to moment basis. That morning, my instructional coach team and I felt this incredible sense of urgency, as we were about to help facilitate and create “At Home Learning Plans” for our elementary schools. We were enthusiastic about taking on the challenge, but knew that we had limited time to complete an unbelievable amount of important work due to a half-day schedule. The information had to be disseminated to families and students that same day; yet we walked into the administration building of my school district calmly, focused, and ready to support the endeavor. Our collaborative efforts with our Assistant Superintendent for Curriculum and Instruction and a dedicated team of educators from across the school district were about to go into action.
A Network of Trust
As educators, we tend to like a sense of control and like to know what to expect (for the most part). On this day, we were walking into the unknown and were navigating the uncharted waters of at-home learning. It was the most organized, peaceful chaos you have ever seen. The waters were a bit rough as we took over the Curriculum and Instruction office and administration conference room, ready to WORK; printing, organizing, debating, sharing all while the clock was ticking. It was a half-day of school and we needed to get these materials out, and collectively, we trusted… YES, TRUSTED each other!! At times it felt like we were building an airplane while we were flying it…but we did it and magic certainly happened all while keeping the students at the core of the work!
Moments later, we rushed to the print shop and as my fellow coaches and I waited for the “Home Learning Plans” to be printed, we turned to our #ALLinEDU Voxer chat for the most productive distraction we could count on! Professional growth is a part of who we are, so it was natural for us to reach out to our PLN for comfort. We discussed the book, we voxed, we laughed, we discussed our need to get all of the essential necessities if school closure was imminent, and even managed to take a picture to commemorate this moment in history.
As we walked to our cars that day, we made a promise to stay connected, to check in on one another and continue to push each other to share information and maintain our love of learning together. And, if this would be the last memory we would have collaborating in person as an Instructional Coach team, (my school district is eliminating the role due to budget constraints), I would be unbelievably proud of our collaborative efforts that day…in fact, it would be a day I’d never forget.
As the “ALL IN” book study kicked off, the questions that were laid on the table were thought provoking and reflective all at the same time. I would have never looked at Bets 1-10 and found these very questions to be the ones to light up a conversation, but they did just that. Intentionally, positive… these two words are what struck me the hardest when combined into one single thought. These two words are the ones that my mind raced back to with each response that came through.
The word intentional was embraced in a variety of ways. With some being intentional about the relationships that they built, while others being intentional about keeping balance between nurturing others’ needs and their own. There was not a “right or wrong” in this conversation, but a solid respect for the perspective that each of us took. We were “sitting down at the same table” and having real conversations. From the perspective of admin to teacher to support staff… it was all there and we were “all in” listening to each other’s take on being intentional. Whether it was actually said, or possibly my mind just computed it this way, I was left reconsidering how being positive affects others.
I am positive that I have a fresh take on this one word! To know that there are educators at all levels doing everything they can to bring out the best in others is so incredibly uplifting. We see it on social media and hear it in chats, but this study has brought about a way of thinking to which pushes my own and that is what I thrive on! Being positive is a choice for many on more days than others realize. The poker face is one that gives us each pause as we realize that even though it may not be intended, that a poker face can be a cultural bust. Even though it may be the one way to hold back what is truly behind those eyes, someone else has already written your story with one glance. On the flip-side, it can be a necessity… one that is a gift of respect in a way of handling a moment. One that does not need explanation. In the big picture, if a poker face is the norm, then the norm is the perception other’s are having. Regardless of our role, in order to create positive relationships, we must allow others in at one point or another.
Are you intentional with connecting with your colleagues? If so what kind of impact has it had?
How does having a positive attitude impact your role? Does a poker face help or hinder?
#2MenAndABook is comprised of Matt Larson and Ricardo Garcia, two principals that continue to shake it up within education by giving each of us a place for safe and vulnerable discussion surrounding incredible topics and books. Some books have been full-blown educational, while others are not, but the common thread is pure goodness, positive push-back and the challenging of one’s thoughts to think beyond our own perspective.